Sunday, April 20, 2008
Sunday in the zoo with Cletus
Hey, guess what? The Pope's in the country!! I don't know if you've heard; they've kind of been keeping it under wraps.So, the long, detailed, photograph-speckled post I had planned to write documenting this weekend's Family Trip To The Zoo will have to wait, as our computer is literally dying before my very eyes. I've already seen the blue screen of impending disaster once today. There's no time to waste on composing multiple paragraphs. Here's a summary, in the form of a short play. Act it out with your friends:
Melinda: [running after child while pushing empty stroller and carrying one of those overflowing diaper bags she used to swear she'd rather die than carry] Cletus, wait. Cletus, wait. Cletus, wait.
Cletus: [trotting through foot-traffic like a pony on speed, pausing only briefly to climb onto every park bench she passes and/or to dig her hands into the mud and wood chips at her feet] YAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYY!
Melinda: Cletus, look, we're at the elephant house. Want to go see the elephants?
Cletus: [racing past elephant house, stopping at orange traffic cone left randomly on the pavement, fondling orange traffic cone] Eeeeeeeeeeeee! Wowie wow!
Melinda: Ok, screw the elephants. Hey, look at that big ostrich over there!
Cletus: [ignoring ostriches, trying to eat rocks] Mama, mmmmmmmmmmmmmm!
Enter Bedraggled-Looking Man and His Dirt-Encrusted Child.
Melinda: [To Man] Hello.
Bedraggled-Looking Man: Hello.
There is a pause while the two consider each other.
Melinda: I paid twenty seven dollars to get in, and my daughter is playing with rocks.
Bedraggled-Looking Man: A robin. We just spent fifteen minutes looking at a robin.
Annnnnd scene.
by Melinda at 3:43 PM |
8 Comments:
But it's nature! She's enjoying nature!
This is hilarious.
When I used to work at the Children's Museum, there were always toddlers who preferred the water fountain or a random piece of lint to the wonders of the exhibit halls ...
-K
Hahahahahahahahahaha!
I'm sorry.
rotflmao Ahhhhh, the joys of spending ridiculous amounts of money for no apparent reason. Good times.
Oh - and dude - again with the no visiting? What's up with that? Do you no like me no mo?
My mom would get hella pissed when we'd got the zoo and I'd take a whole roll of pictures of a mallard duck. Not the multiple endangered animals surrounding us. Oh no. Your basic run-of-the-mill DUCK.
So really, sounds like she's right on track. First rocks. Then ducks. Mark my words.
We took Baby to the zoo for the 1st time last weekend. He was more interested in the other kids than any of the animals. At least he got in for free.
You are hilarious
i'm sitting here in the quiet little library in damascus, va ("friendliest library on the trail") and trying in vain not to explode in laughter as i sit here catching up on your posts.
my niece is the coolest...
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